Stolen, but Brilliant!

Found on Big Rab's Blog:

"UNEXPECTED HEADLINES OF THE DAY:

Commonwealth/Olympic Games Short of Budget

(Insert name of currently unemployed football manager) Flattered to be Linked With Scotland Job

Smith Linked With Scotland Job

Colin and Justin/Jordan/Samantha Fox say “(Insert vacuous rubbish here)”

Jedward (that’s enough headlines – ed.)

On other pages:

Bears Defecating Habits Continue to Centre on Wooded Areas

Pope Confirms He Is Roman Catholic

One Legged Man Swims in a Circle"

I would add  .....  Celtic/Rangers Awarded Penalty in Tight Match

High Rain Levels in Dumbarton

Tony Blair Gets New Job

Oh! The possibilities are endless. 5,000 years off purgatory for the best "Headline"!! Off you go...