Thursday, 25 June 2009

31 Years - Still busy!

It has been an extremely stressful and emotional day, much the same as the day of my ordination to the Diaconate on the Feast of the Nativity of St John the Baptist, (24th June), 1978. I remember the excitement and the joy of the day itself, my unbounded enthusiasm, my energy, my impatience to get going and into ministry rushing head first into something I really knew nothing about!

Todays morning prayers were supplemented by great reflection on that day and how I've changed. My expectations are very different, my experience great and very varied, the joys and the pain that have moulded me into what and who I am today - still a servant of God, but perhaps with lots less energy and certainly a different sort of enthusiasm.

I remember sitting with my mother and father when everyone had "gone home" after a massive party, and just bursting into tears! I think I suddenly stopped laughing at one point and just broke down instead!

The rest of today was spent in great activity, one of those days when I rarely had a moment to myself. Emotional pastoral moments, holding the hand of a very sick friend, emotional family moments, some serious theology teased out with an unexpected visitor to the church, and the practicalities of a Site Meeting and wandering about the new hall in construction. I guess it was days like this that I dreamed about 31 years ago.

Today too has left me drained, and as I think of sleep, I realise that perhaps too often a day's ministry means suddenly stopping laughing and realising my real and utter need of God in my emptiness.


Chris said...

Maybe one of the big changes in you will have been in the growth of your ability to touch people's hearts - certainly that's what this post has done for me!

James said...

Well Fr K the joy of the lord is our strength.31yrs down the line you still doing good so keep on keeping on of course with the RW by your side you need not go weary.You have a goal to score, and finishing line to reach.Indeed it was days like this that you dreamed about 31 years ago.So good for it though guy.

Fr Jimmy

susan s. said...

Better late than never is what they say over here! Congratulations on the first 31 years and may you continue priesting at least that many more!